I’ve been convinced for a while that I’m mainly unemployable. I feel that although I’ve been able to hold jobs that I’m doing worse and worse as time goes on. It’s like I start out wonderfully and then work my way into a slow crash. For a while I had a job where I was changing locations and tasks quite often, and that worked out a bit better. It was one of the three I’ve been laid off from. Well four if you count the mutual realization at one place that I was so-so-SO not the person for the job.

It’s been almost a decade since I’ve had a real job, or even anything approaching an income source.

This here is actually a part of my trying to get my ass in gear and do something.

Yeah. I’ve picked a fine-fucking-time for it, haven’t I?

————- CRASH ————-

That was me hitting a writing wall, sitting back, and staring at the dull shadow reflection of myself on my screen.

————- SWERVE ————-

So, yeah.

It strikes me that I have my Tumblogs kinda swapped. All this shit should be on the “my blog” space and the skin should be on the additional stuff that you could invite other people to add to if you want. I mean, right now at least, this is where I semi-publicly air my mental dirty laundry. This is where I wrestle with the angel and hope that this time something goes back into joint. It’s about as single-source as you can get. Of course, it’s also kind of ludicrous at the moment to think of making proper use of collaborative media. Shit, I’ve got accounts on most of the major “WEB 2.0” sites, and I’ve pretty much dropped out of them. Once in a blue moon I’mm update Twitter or make a comment on Facebook. My “real blog” is painfully out of date, and I’m sure most of my Live Journal friends would be shocked to see me post.

I’m trying to get a bit of a handle on why I’m doing this. More specifically, why write here. Why do I need to write this in a semi-anonymous, semi-public place? Something about feeling like I’m writing to somebody without feeling like I’m rubbing anyone’s face in how I feel.

Great.

Intertherapy…